Swimming with the Gators

Once there was a millionaire who had a collection of live alligators. He kept them in a pool at the back of his mansion.

The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, he decides to throw a huge party.

During the party he announces, "My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!"

As soon as he finishes his last word, there is the sound of a large splash.

The guests all turn to see a man in the pool swimming as fast as he can. They cheer him on as he keeps stroking.

Finally, the swimming man makes it to the other side unharmed. The millionaire is so impressed, he says, "My boy, that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain. Which do you want, my daughter or the one million dollars?"

The man says, "Listen, I don't want your money. I don't want your daughter, either. I want the person who pushed me in that water!"

A guy walks into a bar with an alligator.

A guy walks into a bar with an alligator.
The bartender tells the guys that he can't bring the alligator into the bar.
The man assures the bartender that this is a special alligator and it will be fine as he won't attack anyone.
The bartender asks how he can guarantee such a thing.
The man offers a demonstration.
With other patrons watching the man pulls his pants down and sticks his member into the alligator’s mouth. He then smacks the alligators head three times. He pulls his member out and shows that the alligator has not bitten him.
The man then asks if anyone else would like to try and was shocked when an old lady raised her hand.
She told the man that she wanted to try and added "not to hard sunny, you'll knock out my dentures."